In the Garden of Nirvana

It seems so easy in the struggle of good and evil
When there is no conflict
And the imps and the angels live in harmony
Damn free will and the bitch that ate the apple
That put me in this predicament
Of loving the one I hate or hating the one I love
For wanting to be in bed with another
A different lover every night
Or wanting to be with the same lover but in another’s arms
Only to fantasize of what and who I cannot have
And what I long for

© 2008 Miss Blue

Requiem for Skid Row

When I come to pass
I will not leave my voice
What will remain are my words
Etched in lines
That have gone unread
Taken for granted
Until the moss feathers across
The ivy veins layered
In thick vines
Over my last words
Written in granite

© 2008 Miss Blue

Requiem

I won’t shed a tear
On this third year
The shovel in hand
Where the dirt met the land
In plain pine
Boxed in for all of time
Peering in over the open space
“How did they get such a big man in such a small box?”

© 2008 Miss Blue

Bernard's Bench

School seemed empty today when I was in it
everyone must have been in class.
I was tempted to go upstairs—
visit classrooms.
Sit in on subjects I don’t belong in
with professors I had already taken.
That is until I went to the lab
and spoke to someone at the help desk.
He gave me an unwelcomed attitude.
I almost said to myself, “I can’t wait ‘til I never have to come back here again
I hate this place.”
Then I remembered:
I was free.

© 2008 Miss Blue

Confession of a Fallen Woman

My heart wanders
The mind deceives
I am with another
But I still want the other

© 2008 Miss Blue

La Grisette

You make me want to tell you lies
like I love you,
when I don’t
or you’re the only one
when you’re not.
He will leave
again
and you will still be here.
Then the only lie I will tell
will not be from my mouth
but from my heart.

© 2008 Miss Blue

Saucy Strumpets Make Good Spices

I touch my tongue slightly below my lip
Nibble at the hot tip
Topping the mounds
Dripping
Stains of desire
On my shirt
I reach for it
Pulling it in towards my mouth
The throbbing feeling of taking it in too soon
All too hot
I want more
Light whispers of breath
“Don’t forget the tip.”
He says
It is not enough
How I adore
When the pizza man comes to my door


© 2008 Miss Blue

Another Round

At 6 P.M. the church bell rings
I think of my dead
Too early
And I resurrect
Thoughts in my head
Of my zombie’s past
And I wish the bell rang
Much later

© 2008 Miss Blue

Churchyard Hero

My Mary Jane’s sank with each step
I hid my courage within a bottle
My faith, a flask with a picture of Jesus
Holy Friday my heart is wholly staggering
With each sip of praise
Every stumbling step forward
I join the group of mourners
Slowly sinking in the mud
Fresh dirt from the newly dug space
Stunned faces from the Jagerbomb dropped
We attend liquid confessional afterward
Disclosing our sins
I wipe the dirt from my shoes
Dust the ash that missed the tray
And leave behind what is lost

© 2008 Miss Blue

Conceptual Print

Text of your desire
Leaves things unclear
Little black letters
Cannot compare to
The scrawled print
In fits of passion
Tear smeared longings
Visible creases
Like wrinkled sheets
The lucidity of capital boldness
Is lost in the lightly perfumed
Letter
Of the distance of our desire

© 2008 Miss Blue

Soiled Sheets

I like my sheets
When they are soiled
In another’s love
Unwittingly you lay in them
And lie in them
Thinking I did not know
She was there in my absence
You embrace me
Encase me in your body
The flesh tantrum
Further soiling my sheets
We lay entwined
Post coital divine
Forgetting that there was
Someone here before you
Making me think:
I must wash these sheets.

© 2008 Miss Blue

Apt. #5

To my lover
I did not love
Whom I fucked
But did not screw
To which I have deceived
In the bedroom
As my delicacies of desire
Only found one use
To destroy the heart of another
It was not you

© 2008 Miss Blue

Just In Time

No love lost
Like the pain of your lust
Take all the others but me
Icy words on blood soaked wrists
You say you can’t bring me to your world
Don’t wanna take me down
Baby you have
But you don’t see
And claim you must let me be
Destroyed your own being
Tangled in me is not what you need
Words continue to slice into my flesh
Deeper and harder
Annihilate the vanity of my vein
With every breath you take
You disgust me
Like the sickened fetus
Abandoned
You just can’t stay
Don’t want me involved anymore in your hell don’t want to hurt me
My blue lips speak a different version
You were just in time
Saved me
Taped my life back together
And now you want to cut it apart
Hurt is something you cannot do
Claim your existence will only be my ruination
And I’m down on the floor
Because it’s you I adore
I lay in the puddle of my love
You speak of a broken heart
But not mine
Yours
And you’re the only one responsible for the blame

© 2005 Miss Blue

In Your Defense

In your defense
You are a man of your word
The promises you made you have kept
The apologies you have said
You have meant
In your defense
You could not be everything you wanted to be
See everything you wanted to see
Learn everything you wanted to learn
In your defense
You didn’t know where life would take you
From one woman’s arms to another
Your mark left on each
Treating some better than others
In your defense
You did not know what to do
When all was lost
And turned to coldness
In your defense
You lost your heart
The acceptance to go on
The ability to receive
In your defense
You learned forgiveness
Found your way
Lost in confusion
In your defense
You will never know
That I will always be by your side
In your defense

© 2008 Miss Blue